EDGE San Diego

Robert Leleux’s "The Living End: A Memoir of Forgetting and Forgiving" is a story of Alzheimer’s and a family’s attempt to care for a grandmother whose recent "forgetfulness" gives the family a chance at reconciliation.

Leleux’s maternal grandmother JoAnn-an elegant Southerner with an affinity for keeping everyone entertained-is on the onset of dementia. Her illness brings the family together but it’s her forgetting the past, including the history of family wounds and anger, especially her decades-long estrangement from her daughter, that allows them to forgive and make the most of the little time they have left.

As opposed to the usual Alzheimer’s stories, where the focus is on the patient’s behavior and deterioration and the caregiver’s exhaustion, Leleux makes the wiser choice to explore the surprising possibilities that come with losing one’s memory (there’s nothing negative to recall) and delighting in the everyday since you don’t know how much time will be allowed the patient. This story is a lesson on how when we live in the past, especially in the resentments, we stunt our growth and prevent ourselves from becoming who we really have the potential to be.

The author does a great job at transitioning from childhood recollections when the family rifts began to the present time when the mother-daughter estrangements start to mend, and taking the reader through experiences in Texas, New York, and Tennessee.

"The Living End" is funny and tender, and a page-turner. Robert Leleux is witty and wonderful at putting on the southern charm. His writing is sharp and colorful, and he puts the reader in the thick of the family’s journey with vivid descriptions and dialogue.

"The Living End" is a reminder that, in the end, we are not defined by our memories. It’s a must-read for both entertainment and relearning some important life lessons.

by Robert Leleux